What’s one thing you can do to create a positive and motivating business culture for employees and customers alike?

Communication, of course!

This is such an important part of creating a culture that draws new talent, while keeping your current team engaged and happy. If you’re a business owner or team leader, you have an opportunity to set the bar for effective communication with team members and customers.

A while back, I saw an example of poor communication in action.

I was at a business that I frequently visit and have gotten to know the owner and much of his team over the years I’ve been a customer. While I was there, I overheard a conversation between the owner and one of his team members. The owner was obviously feeling frustrated with his employee, yet instead of talking things out with her, he turned what could have been a short conversation into a personal attack.

Watching the interaction was awkward, as it showed me a side of the owner I had never seen before and obviously left the team member feeling upset. I doubt she remembered anything valuable from the conversation, given how stressed out she was. Watching the dynamic of the conversation play out reminded me that the words we use and the way we express ourselves plays a huge role in whether communication is effective or unproductive.

If you’re wanting to get more out of how you communicate with customers and team members, here are some ideas to help you build a more positive team culture.

1.    Respond, Don’t React

If you feel frustrated, angry, or emotionally charged about an issue it’s easy to go off on a rant that can be hurtful to team members and harmful to your business.

In these moments it’s quite easy to react to the emotion you’re feeling, and it’s often something that has nothing to do with the current conversation. Maybe you’re reacting to something that happened earlier that day, or to many small irritations that have been building over time.

The magic happens when you pause and step back for a moment before saying a word. This momentary break disrupts your reaction pattern and creates just enough space to ask yourself if the reaction is part of the current conversation, or if something else is contributing to your feelings of frustration, anger, and more. In the gap between receiving communication and responding, you empower yourself to choose a way of speaking that is effective and respectful, one that will likely get you a better response and, in turn, a better result and happier team members and customers.

2.    See the Humanity in the Other Person

Anger and frustration can lead you to read aggression or bad intentions in the other person. These feelings often track back to your own emotions and may even come from a bad experience in a similar situation that happened years ago.

In the heat of the moment, it’s easy to forget that you’re in conversation with another human being who has their own unique perspective and who’s managing their own set of fears and concerns. When you see the humanity in the other person, it helps you relate to them on a level that allows for connection in an authentic and meaningful way instead of taking the easy route of dropping into attack mode.

3.    How You Say It, Is As Important As What You Say

Body language and tone of voice make quite the impression. Many studies have been done on the subject, showing that our nonverbal communication cues make up anywhere from 70% to 93% of all communication.

In the heat of an emotionally charged situation there’s potential for the other person to see you as either supportive or aggressive. Your nonverbal cues are what transmits much of that impression.

Leaning in menacingly when engaged in an encounter, crossing your arms and shaking your head or resorting to a loud voice or sarcastic tone, are all unconscious ways of communicating that can put out a confrontational vibe.

The result? The other person either shuts down or decides to fight back, which only makes things worse. Become aware of the tone of your voice and body language habits that could potentially create a confrontational atmosphere.

When speaking to a team member or customer in a difficult situation, take a deep breath before saying a word. Then use a calm, level voice to convey your thoughts and feelings. Display body language that conveys openness and acceptance, like uncrossed arms or nodding your head to acknowledge that you see and understand the other person.

Communication is one of the most powerful tools we have at our disposal as leaders. It helps us share our feelings and lets us connect with and encourage others. In moments of anger or frustration communication can be a double-edged sword that isolates or diminishes another person.

The good news is that you have the power to determine your response in frustrating situations. Start with the tips above to set yourself up for successful communication in difficult situations. It will help you lift morale and build lasting loyalty with your team and customers.